The Author, Amanda I. Greene
A Detour To "Grow Up"
The environmental field was the closest thing I could imagine myself being heartfully committed to in the full time job world working for someone else, and it complemented my undergrad studies in chemistry, which was fun. I loved the work I did and the amazing leaders I met. Yet things weren’t lining up for me – due both to my own issues with self-confidence, as well as things outside my control such as clients retiring and divisions spinning off.
I now look back at graduate school and post grad employment as a period of “growing up.” No matter what I did in this time, I would have been growing, learning and becoming my version of “ready” - ready to share my awe-tistic heart’s first dream, Squishy Blueberry, with the world.
At the same time – the question remains – could I have taken the leap earlier? Should I have? After all, I had a gnawing sense that I was hiding in my environmental career. Perhaps by staying in my full time job I was actually delaying aspects of my personal growth. As many of us know, starting and thriving in our own business requires at least the same self esteem to succeed as working at someone else's company. But who really knows how things would have evolved if I'd leapt sooner? Perhaps it was perfect timing.
I do not regret my detour, and still look at it as my growing up period while Squishy Blueberry was brewing underneath. And I did make some progress on the book during my seven year haitus with the help of some amazing authors (Steven Covey, Napoleon Hill, Eckhart Tolle) recommended to me by friends. But I was moving at a snails pace.
What Do I Mean By Growing Up?
In fact, I had no problem having confidence in Squishy Blueberry and D’inkling Publishing, because I knew they came from a place of pure inspiration, represented the things I love to do naturally, and were the culmination of much of my studies from teens through 20s in chemistry, philosophy, meditation, and personal development. I mean, how can you go wrong with that brew?
Rather, it was myself I needed to believe in, in all sort of ways, including: my ability to execute the idea well; my ability to attract people with similar ideals who I felt
"got" Squishy Blueberry; and, most essential, that I was worthy of not just surviving but thriving doing something I love.
What Was the Key?
The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People, A New Earth, and Think & Grow Rich, which I read before I left my full time job, were just the beginning of the amount of learning I had before me as I embarked on my dream of bringing Squishy Blueberry to life. Additional books/authors include: A Woman's Worth (Marianne Williamson), The Big Leap (Gay Hendricks), Leveraging the Universe (Mike Dooley), Wallace Wattles, Gabrielle Bernstein, and Esther Hicks. And there are many many more.
The books alone were invaluable to me, and are a very small investment for the amount of internal confidence and power they can unleash, especially when read repeatedly. I also tried out several women's coaching programs focused on releasing false beliefs and developing self worth in order to live the life of our dreams. These programs range from free (e.g. introductory videos by many coaches), to a few hundred dollars for several week long group tele-classes, to thousands for more one-on-one attention. They are much deeper than any traditional therapy I had received through mainstream channels and were the kind of help for which I had been searching for over a decade. Not just to help me with my career, but in order to truly live!
Each Journey is Unique
And the journey is never done. There is always a next step, in business and in our own personal development. I still have a long path before me. And I am not against working for someone else, say doing technical editing (something I love to do). But I will do so knowing that it is ultimately an investment in myself and my dreams, which gives it a whole new level of meaning.