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"We Teach What We Most Need to Learn?"

4/29/2014

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A couple years ago we heard the phrase, "we teach what we most need to learn," in a class we took on finding our dreams and life purpose. It immediately resonated and we felt truth in this statement. After some time contemplating it, we think it would helpful to talk more about what it means, especially as it might be confusing if taken too literally.

What it Doesn't Mean

Let's start out with what it doesn't mean. It doesn't mean that we teach what we know the least about. Or that teachers of a topic know less about the topic than other people.  What we believe it's saying is that our greatest challenges are the areas we wind up studying the most in life, and therefore on many levels become experts on. 

Our Challenges Deepen our Understanding

A simple example would be someone with dyslexia learning to read. A good majority of people read naturally from left to right. But some people's brains are wired differently, and their brains intake information in a different order. When someone with dyslexia learns to train their brain to read left to right, they study the the process and "know" things - the details of the process - far more in depth than someone who has always read naturally left to right since they were a child. 

In this sense the person who had great challenges in reading, and therefore had to spend years training their eye-brain coordination, becomes an expert on it. They acquire the tools to teach it to others who also have dyslexia (and may even shed light on things that are relevant to those that don't).  Furthermore, it is often the case that those with a particular learning disability would rather be taught by someone who had it and overcame it, than someone who never had it (there are exceptions of course).

This idea of teaching what we most need to learn (i.e. have studied the most) applies to all kinds of things people learn and teach through out life. If you are overcoming a tendency towards OCD, for example, you have probably been trying out all kinds of tools to put yourself in the present moment and accept things are OK as they are -  tools that others that more naturally live in the present perhaps use but not necessarily consciously, and so they are less apt to be able to articulate "how" they are doing it.  Another common example is eating issues. Those who have been through it and overcome it are often considered more "credible" on the topic as a teacher than someone that hasn't.

Your Challenges are Also a Key to Your Gifts!

What we find particularly interesting and inspiring to consider, is that if you have a challenge in a particular area, and you are conscientiously working to overcome it, there is a good chance it has to do with one of your gifts, or life purpose(s) - whether it's a full or part-time job, a hobby, or something you share with friends and family.  

We invite you to think about the areas you have struggled with the most, and think about what you have learned about them. Now of course we all have unique perspectives on everything there is to experience in life - and we encourage people to share their insights on many different topics. But in this case, we are talking about those areas that you have had the most difficult time with. 

Learning from Example

We also want to emphasize, that just because a person hasn't been through what you've been through doesn't mean they can't be a teacher. We have learned from many people by example, which is considered one of the most effective ways to teach/learn. For example, if you want to teach a child about sharing, the best way to do it is by being a good sharer yourself. Or if you want a child to learn about table manners, modeling them to your kids can be far more effective than simply correcting them at the table.

Lots and lots of things can be taught by example. As I've mentioned before, I had a friend who seemed to attract wonderful things into her life all the time, and so I modeled certain things after her, such as taking immaculate care of the space and things I DO have.  But if I had asked her outright, "how do you have a fulfilling life?", odds are she wouldn't be able to articulate exactly how she does it. Because she never had to study it, it always just came naturally to her. 

The main reminder here is that "anyone can be your friend or teacher" as Sir Pepe so wisely taught me in Refections. But there are different kinds of learning and teaching. And the good news is this counter-intuitive perspective that areas we have had the hardest struggles may actually be our expertise!  Rest assured, your pain and suffering is not for naught!
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