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Presence is a Gift you Give

4/22/2014

1 Comment

 
Here at the Blueberry Planet we have a lot of stories on the topic of being present, from childhood examples to fortune cookie quotes and a mysterious adventure with a stranger in the night that happened to be a golden retriever. 

Today, we just want to share our awe of how giving someone attention is one of the greatest gifts you can give. Giving someone attention, when non-judgmental and curious, is basically the same thing as being present to someone - listening, understanding, seeing it through their eyes. And I don't have to tell you how good it feels to be listened to, to truly feel heard. And often it's just a single person listening, like a good friend, that is so helpful. 

The same goes for being the listener, the giver of attention. This feels good too. We get to step outside ourselves, we get to hear stories that teach us or resonate with us and make us feel not so alone. We get to feel good the way it does when we give someone a present they really like! There can be purpose in it, though that can take some fine tuning (more on this later). We like the way the spelling of the words leads us to see attention and "presence" as gifts and "presents."
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This is the fortune cookie story! It's a short one. When we were living in NYC we got this fortune and though we didn't understand it completely at the time, it stuck in our minds forever. 
"The greatest gift you can give another human being is rapt attention to their existence."
Picture of Cookies and blank paper from www.moonfloweryoga.com

You Are Someone Too!

One thing it seems we forget in the process of give and take is the importance of giving attention to our own selves. Whether it be being aware of when you are hungry or tired. Or simply being aware of how you are feeling in general. And listening to and learning from it, rather than "ignoring" it. Ignoring is sort of the opposite of attention. In certain cases it can be a useful tool, but not when it comes to what you are feeling.  

So if you are feeling sad, being present with yourself can cheer you up in the same way someone else's attention can cheer you up. In fact, we at the Blueberry Planet believe being present to yourself is one of (if not the) single most important thing you can do for yourself in your own growth and development. And you know how we feel about growth! Growth and change IS life.

You might ask, so how do you give yourself attention? This question warrants a separate post, and we are still learning about it ourselves. (It's simple, but sometimes it's hard to be simple!) For now, let's start with being aware of your five senses - how are you feeling inside and outside, what are you seeing, smelling, tasting and hearing ? Are you happy, sad, tired, hungry, excited, curious? 

Try it out today and give yourself the gift of your own rapt attention and presence.
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1 Comment
Katherine
5/2/2014 03:27:26 pm

I think this post has a lot of resonance for me as a parent. It can be so hard with everything going on in the world, in life, in the house, to really be present for our kids. Someone once told me to just let it go for 5 or 10 minutes. Be truly present in my kid's life. Play. You don't have to be a perfect parent (who is?) but those 5 minutes every day translate into a world of value for your kids. Small victories, but this is something I can achieve.

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    is an expression of my Inner Child, reminding me to have fun and make room for play, while teaching me lessons I did not integrate from Kindergarten about the imagination and believing in myself.
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